Housekeeping Advice

Margot:  "Mom, you really need to sweep beneath my bureau."

Me:  "Why?"

Margot:  "Because - it is completely full of dust mice under there!"

Marriage Plans

Jane:  "Why is Margot saying she wants to marry Eric when I’m going to marry him?"

Eric: "Jane, I can just marry both of you."

Jane: "But I’m going to marry David, too."

Eric:  "I know David, so that’s fine."

Jane (flinging back of hand over forehead):  "this is so confusing . . ."

The Burdens of the Middle Child

Me:  "Margot, I'm going to Washington, DC early tomorrow morning, so I may not see you before you go to school - but I'm just going for the day, so I'll be back before you go to bed."

Margot:  "Oh, Mommy, I'm going to miss you so much!!"

Me:  "I'll miss you, too - "

Margot:  "I'm going to miss you as much as a baby piglet would miss its mother, if the mother had a lot of other piglets and wasn't paying very much attention to that piglet.  Because baby pigs really love their mothers, you know?  And if they don't get a lot of attention from their mothers, they really, really miss them.  I'm going to miss you that much, Mom - I really am."

Note to self:  plan one-on-one activity with Margot ASAP.

Gender Differences & Analytical Processes

Jane:  "I like to drink milk, and pretend it's chocolate.  And, it's soooo yummy, but it's really good because it's like you have chocolate milk, but it's healthy."

Eric (Jane's friend):  "I don't think about all that, I just drink my chocolate milk."

A New Role for Daddy

Today Margot's class had a field trip to the Museum of Fine Arts, which prompted this conversation:

Margot:  "Mommy, is Dad going to be a mascot for my field trip, or not?  I really want him to."

Me:  "A what?"

Margot:  "A mascot.  You know, one of the parents who comes along on the trip to help watch the kids."

Allergy Season

Jane:  ''This morning my eye was itchy and it felt like allergies.  I told my mom and she said it wasn't allergies - but it was."
 

Lindsay:  ''What do eye allergies feel like?"

Jane:  "Like my eye wanted to sneeze.''

Of Vampires and Virgins

Claire:  "Margot, I read in the Guinness Book of World Records that there was a woman who practiced vampirism and that she killed over 600 virgins.''

Margot:  "What's a virgin?"

Claire:  ''It's a woman who has never been married . . . I think.  Or a woman from Virginia.''

Today's Factoid

From Jane:

"Mommy, the best thing about me is that I'm really easy to carry."

(This is totally false.  She's actually really heavy.)

Let's Talk About Feelings

Jane is obsessed with candy - it's second only to her obsession with babies.  The other night she came wandering out of her room about 30 minutes after she'd been put to bed.

Jane:  "Mommy, can I have some candy?"
Me:  "No, of course not."
Jane:  "Please?  I love candy."
Me:  "No.  Go back to bed."
Jane:  [stomps to her room]

Five minutes later, she reappears, looking very unhappy and says to me, "Mommy, I want to talk to you about my feelings."  I feel bad for being short with her, and am ready to apologize.

Me:  "Okay, sweetie.  How are you feeling?"
Jane (pausing):  "Well . . . I'm feeling like I want some candy."

Vocab 101

Claire asked if she could have oatmeal for dinner tonight.  This was noteworthy because, after approximately eight years of being an avid oatmeal-eater, she has spent the last two months insisting that she actually hates oatmeal.

Margot:  "Claire, you said you don't like oatmeal anymore."
Claire:  "Well, I don't.  But I'm trying to get my taste buds re-adjusted to it.  Then I'll like it again."
Margot:  "You're getting your what re-adjusted?"
Claire:  "My taste buds."
Margot:  "Um, Claire?  I think you mean taste bugs."